[mike777]

folks the super rich are different from you and me


this is not about being a bud.


If you just want sex you dont pick one girl and pay her 200k or more a year.

In fact often the mistress has great political power.

As I pointed out my office had a couple of these girls..one became the new wife.

the other one married another rich dude with a private jet after being dropped by the married guy.

I cant say either of them were really happy.

[VMars]

Lover seems most fitting.

Sponsor.

Ron.

Significant Other (I usually say "SO").

Bill-payer

[kenberg]

 Winstonm, on 2012-October-12, 14:29, said:

A woman I know is the mistress of a married man, and I heard him described as "her boyfriend". This seemed to me a poor description of one who keeps a mistress, but I could not think of a better term.

Is there an actual term used in this sense?

An idea just came to me. Perhaps you could ask his wife what term she uses to describe the mistress. That might work for starters. Possibly she could also supply the correct term to describe her husband.

[Winstonm]

 kenberg, on 2012-October-13, 08:10, said:

An idea just came to me. Perhaps you could ask his wife what term she uses to describe the mistress. That might work for starters. Possibly she could also supply the correct term to describe her husband.

[gwnn]

[Cascade]

 Bbradley62, on 2012-October-12, 21:39, said:

How about "my man"?

Yeah she owns him right?

[gwnn]

Leases on occasion.

[Aberlour10]

 mike777, on 2012-October-12, 15:06, said:

Sugar Daddy

seriously that is what we called them in Chicago, several girls in the office had them.

The whole world knows this since Kelly Bundy has had several dates with them heh

[gordontd]

 Winstonm, on 2012-October-12, 14:29, said:

Is there an actual term used in this sense?

Pension plan?

[ahh]

In the far North East of Scotland the local dialect is Doric and we have no trouble announcing a person with whom we are in relationship but are not married to ---- they are called our 'Bidey in '

[crazy4hoop]

Bill Clinton...

Philanderer

[kenberg]

I have made a couple of flippand responses. If I were to try for serious I suppose I would ask more about the context. Marriages vary. If husband and wife have long since gone their separate ways but remain married for any of various practical reasons, then I woould see no objection to boyfriend. They won't be getting married, but so what. But we usually do not speak of the woman as a mistress in such a case. In fact, she is called his girlfriend. The fact of the marriage is a technicality. Some of course would object on moral grounds, but people have been making such arrangements sinc marriage began.

Calling her a mistress suggests to me that the marriage is intact, the guy simply wants an extra and for some reason his wife has agreed to this arrangement. My wife would not, I assure you, and I really have no direct experience with this sort of thing. I read "The Adventures of Augie March" a thousand years ago when I was in college. I seem to remember a description of, I think< Augie's brother or cousin or something: "He took a mistress to get away from his wife and found himself with two wives".

[Vampyr]

 kenberg, on 2012-October-13, 17:37, said:

Calling her a mistress suggests to me that the marriage is intact, the guy simply wants an extra and for some reason his wife has agreed to this arrangement.

Why do you assume the wife knows?

[kenberg]

The wife always knows! No, of course she might not. But the op discussed the proper term to use. This suggests that we are speaking of an acknowledged relationship. If the relationship is not acknowledged, I would say the proper term is silence.

[Winstonm]

He is too old to be a boy. No one knows if the wife knows. Man friend?

[kenberg]

Or maybe just friend. Seriously, if the wife doesn't know, or might not know, or would like be unknowing, I would go with friend. I see nothing against it. Her is a friend, and beyond that, I see no need for precision.

[Vampyr]

 kenberg, on 2012-October-14, 14:00, said:

If the relationship is not acknowledged, I would say the proper term is silence.

...

He is a friend, and beyond that, I see no need for precision.

Both good points.